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Archive for the ‘Swindle Sheet News Bits’ Category
SOME GUY PUNCHES LEONA LEWIS IN THE FACE

While you might have heard Leona Lewis‘ BLOCKBUSTER hit “Bleeding Love” so many times last year that you wanted to punch yourself in the face until it stopped playing over and over again your brain, some guy in London just did you one better—he punched Leona Lewis herself in the face. The 24-year-old singer was at the book signing for her recently released autobiography, Dreams, at a bookstore in London’s Piccadilly area on Tuesday when the incident occurred.

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More Reasons Why Being Deaf Sucks/Rocks – Randomness

I can’t really focus this week, so I’m just going to give a smattering of thoughts on a variety of subjects.

Quixote

I’m really irked that when I ripped the newest Yeah Yeah Yeahs album, It’s Blitz!, to iTunes, it came up as “It’s Blitz! (Instrumentals)”, even though it weren’t instrumentals. I’ve spent the last few weeks searching for the bloody instrumentals to that very album, but to no avail.

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NUDE RIHANNA PHOTOS THREATEN TO STEAL THE THUNDER OF NUDE CASSIE PHOTOS

I can’t imagine that Cassie was particularly happy when her nude photos (leaked last week, quite possibly by her) ended up getting overshadowed by a subsequent crop of nude photos, allegedly of fellow R&B/pop singer and Chris Brown punching bag Rihanna. And I’m sure Cassie thought that this would get her some much needed buzz, as any buzz not involving her dalliances with The Ad Hoc Award-Demanding Mouth-Breather could be viewed as good buzz.

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NEW LEONA LEWIS ALBUM POSSIBLY POSTPONED AFTER HORSE HEAD-BUTTS HER, MORE

You just can’t make this stuff up, folks. Just weeks after Madonna was dumped from a horse (not surprisingly, even a horse can’t stand to be around her), the equines continue to revolt, this time leaving singer Leona Lewis in their path of destruction.

A seasoned horseback rider since childhood, Lewis had been given a stallion for her 24th birthday last month. She was riding the horse near her home in Los Angeles last month when he suddenly turned on her, rearing up and whipping his head back, striking her in the face and tossing her to the ground.

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SOULJA BOY REACTS TO COLLEGE PROTEST WITH HORRIBLE SPELLING, GRAMMAR

A group of students staging a protest in response to a scheduled Soulja Boy concert at the University of Minnesota Duluth on Friday apparently threw the guy who pretends to be a rapper for a loop, as a horribly written Twitter entry would suggest:

“WTF I’m in minesota its a group of maf*ckaz prtoesting my show. This shit on all the news.”

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NICOLE SCHERZINGER FALLS VICTIM TO THE FLASHBULBS OF DOOM

It was only a month ago that unofficial Pussycat Dolls leader Nicole Scherzinger suffered a wardrobe malfunction during a concert in Amsterdam, but she’s once again been exposed, this time by Rihanna’s FLASHBULBS OF DOOM while attending a performance of Chicago on Broadway.

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LILY ALLEN THROWS SH!T FIT, WATER BOTTLE AT PAPARAZZI, MORE NEWS

Last Thursday in London, singer Lily Allen had yet another run-in with paparazzi, this time directly after an incident where they were following her in her car, and one of their cars bumped into the one in which she was riding. Allen had her driver stop, as the paparazzi also exited their cars to get their shots (natch), and she fired off a slew of curse words before unleashing the URBAN SERAPE PHYSICAL INTENSITY, throwing her water bottle and kicking at one, while taking a swing at another.

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DMX FACES ADDITIONAL CHARGES AFTER ASSAULT ON CORRECTIONS OFFICER, MORE NEWS

Apparently not happy with only spending 90 days in prison, rapper DMX is still bringing the shenanigans, and is now being charged with assault after throwing a tantrum, and a tray of food, at a corrections officer, according to the Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office.

DMX (né Earl Simmons), 38, is currently serving the 90-day term at Maricopa County Jail, outside of Phoenix, after having pled guilty last December to felony charges of theft, drug possession and a misdemeanor charge of animal cruelty. After refusing to report for a prison work assignment and scheduled medication last month, subsequently shouting profanities at a different corrections officer, possibly as a result of not getting his meds, Simmons was punished by being put on an exclusive bread-and-water diet.

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NICOLE SCHERZINGER, SOLANGE KNOWLES SUFFER UNRELATED WARDROBE MALFUNCTIONS

Yeah, so this one’s almost a week old, but I’ve been sick since last Tuesday…

A couple weeks ago during a Pussycat Dolls concert in Amsterdam, Nicole Scherzinger (the Beyoncé of the group) suffered a bit of a wardrobe malfunction (don’t click on this or the next link at work, or you may get canned)...read full article...

AUBREY O’DAY PHONES IT IN FOR NUDE PLAYBOY PICTORIAL

The issue featuring former Danity Kane member Aubrey O’Day’s much-anticipated Playboy pictorial hit stands (and the Web) on Friday, and the results are most likely going to disappoint a large majority of fans out there. Then again, if you were actually a “fan,” you probably already knew this because you bought the damn thing. Sucker. Thanks to an unprecedented amount of Photoshopping, O’Day looks more like a Stepford drone than the sexy M.F. that she claims (and everyone makes her out) to be.

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Machine Gun Funk - MACHINEGUNFUNK is equal parts irreverent and brash…passionate and unpretentious. The eclectic voices heard on MGF focus on music through skewed and slightly cracked glasses. Our opinions are loud and our biases are even louder.

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