Jeffrey R. Fernandez has been an Inside Pulse stalwart from day 1, and now heads up the offbeat Machine Gun Funk music zone. His MGF colleague Mike Eagle didn’t fair so well a few weeks ago, but JRF is confident and collected. Have you ever wondered what would happen if someone tried to SWINDLE the Hot Seat?

1) As you know, we always start out with geometry – how many sides does a Pentadecagon have?

JRF: Being a student of Latin (and a former mathlete), I know that penta is five and deca is 10. Ergo, five and ten is fifteen.

Hot Seat Judges: Excellent work and bonus points for not googling it. Although you still only get the 1 point. 1 out of 1

2)In your flagship column the Swindle Sheet, you always start out with an Opening Shot. Come up with a caption for this picture of Broken Dial’s Shawn M Smith and CM Punk:

JRF: Shawn M. Smith of Broken Dial recently got a chance to sit down and interview ECW’s CM Punk. Needless to say, the exchange turned sour after a mere thirty seconds, after it was unfortunately revealed that CM Punk is a fan of Kevin Federline. Shawn is still walking with a limp.

Hot Seat Judges: Always points for descriptions of additional injuries to SMS 2 out of 2

3) With WWE heading into the draft this Monday on Raw, there could be a lot of change on all three brands. While there was no official WWE-wide draft in 2006, there was a mini draft with Paul Heyman allowed to draft one wrestler each from Raw and Smackdown to join the new ECW. Which 2 wrestlers did Heyman draft to ECW?

JRF: I stopped watching WWE professionally after the botched Invasion angle, but I still catch the occasional show here and there. That said, I’m not certain, but I’m going to guess The Big Show and Kurt Angle, because they were both pretty much with the ECW brand from its re-inception and were not ECW originals.

Hot Seat Judges: Half right – Angle was indeed drafted from Smackdown but Heyman drated RVD from Raw. Interestingly WWE.com lists RVD but not Angle in their draft history article. 2 out of 3

4) With major candies coming out with alternate and limited edition varieties every month (check out Candy For Dinner to see them pictured), put the following alternate candy bar coatings in order of appropriateness, from most to least appropriate: a) dark chocolate b) white chocolate c) peanut butter coating d) milk chocolate e) Cherry Chocolate

JRF: What the hell is cherry chocolate? Cherry flavored chocolate, or chocolate with pieces of cherry in it? Either way, it sounds like too much of a mess to work on a large scale. Milk chocolate is a classic and has shown it has staying power, so it’s first. Dark chocolate also has a steady fanbase, so it’s second. White chocolate, while not nearly as popular as the other two, has long been a delicacy and is showing that it can hold its own among supermarket candy brands, so it would be third, followed by peanut butter and that cherry chocolate abomination.

Hot Seat Judges: A well put together list. We might have switched dark and white chocolate, but only a minor infraction 3 out of 4

5) And finally, speaking of George Michael, what are your 3 favorite Wham! songs?

JRF: How do you figure out whether or not I get the point based on this? It’s a matter of opinion, Widro. First you steal Dana Suzanne from me and now this. I see how it is. This is the question that ensures that no one gets a perfect five, because it’s subjective. That’s it, folks… the game is fixed! You heard it here first! But I digress, and I am going with three hits in (1) “Everything She Wants”, (2) “Careless Whisper”, (3) “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”

Hot Seat Judges: Down deep, everyone’s favorite Wham! song is Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. So do you get the point for this question? no-no 3 out of 5

Jeffrey R Fernandez sat down on the Hot Seat with confidence and creativity, and held up strong with 3 out of 5, notwithstanding his questioning of the very core of Hot Seat judging in question 5. You can catch JRF many times weekly in Machine Gun Funk.

Next week we have Rob Blatt making his return, in the meantime check out how Blatt did Last time in the Hot Seat

2007 Hot Seat Results
Friday June 8 – Jeffrey R Fernandez - 3 out of 5
Friday June 1 – Gregory Wind – 3 out of 5
Friday May 25 – Mike Eagle – 2 out of 5
Friday May 18 – Eric S - 4 out of 5
Friday May 11 – Steve Murray – 2 out of 5
Friday May 4 – Danny Cox – 2 out of 5
Friday March 2 – Kevin Wong – 0 out of 5
Friday February 23 – Scott “Kubryk” Sawitz – 3 out of 5
Friday February 16 – Gordi Whitelaw – 3 out of 5
Friday February 2 – Shawn M Smith – 1 out of 5

Mike Eagle is one of the Machine Gun Funk originals, submitting commentaries and reviews. He has stepped up and thinks he has the strength and tenacity to withstand the Hot Seat. Is he right? Let’s find out…

1) As you know, we always start out with geometry – what does it mean for two shapes to be congruent?

Mike Eagle: Wow, I tutor fifth graders so I thought I’d be prepared for this… Okay, I think it means they share an angle….

Hot Seat Judges: That is wrong; those fifth graders are in big trouble. 0 out of 1

2) The default song on your MySpace is listed as being part of the “Sucka Free Mix”. Does that mean that suckas were not involved in the creation of the mix, suckas are not allowed to listen to the mix, or both?

Mike Eagle: Unfortunately we could only cover the creation portion. If my calculations, countless suckas have heard the mix since its original pressing. if my calculations are correct that is.

Hot Seat Judges: How exactly does one calculate how many suckas have listened to a mix? 0 out of 2

3) WWE has seen an unprecedented amount of main event wrestlers going down to major injuries in the last few months, including HHH, HBK, The Undertaker and Booker T. Which 3 wrestlers not currently signed to WWE would you hire to replenish the main event scene?

Mike Eagle: I’m perfectly willing to take a dive on this question to express my personal opinion. First, I’d take Teddy Hart. He’d never main event for the “E” but he’s the most exciting guy that’s not on TV every week. Next, I’d pick up Samoa Joe and have him beat Umaga in a dance contest every week until Wrestlemania. I’d round it out with AJ Styles, cause he’s the world’s greatest metrosexual.

Hot Seat Judges: The judges don’t think you took a dive at all, those are three great choices that also are outside of Vince’s idea for main eventers, which is a bonus. 1 out of 3

4) Pepsi Co. owns both Taco Bell and KFC, two of the country’s top fast food restaurants that lately have been creating new dishes that mash together tons of items they already have on the menu. Using any or all of the provided ingredients from both establishments, create a new product for a combined Taco Bell/KFC complete with what you would call it: (a) nacho cheese, (b) Honey BBQ chicken strips, (c) refried beans, (d) biscuits, (e) mashed potatoes, (f) gravy, (g) pico de gallo, (h) taco meat, (i) corn, (j) tortilla chips

Mike Eagle: Okay, I’d take a honey glazed chicken wing and roll it around in pico de gallo. Then I’d roll up a gordita tortilla like a waffle cone and stick the chicken leg in the top of it so that if you held the chicken end it would look like a car vacuum. I’d call it a “Fernandez”.

Hot Seat Judges: That sounds like a winning entree in the same vein as KFC Famous Bowls and Taco Bell Crunchwrap supreme, but unfortunately, use of the gordita shells disqualifies the Fernandez from contention. 1 out of 4

5) And finally, in your Letters From FreakLoud, you provide perspective on hip-hop from an insider’s point of view. Can you give the Hot Seat a small verse extolling the virtues of Inside Pulse and Machine Gun Funk? Rhyming optional (but welcomed).

Mike Eagle: The pulse is very blessed/ Unlike Hyatte’s hairy chest/ writings the very best/ with drug tips by Eric S./

Since Aaron left/ My news postings barren theft/ has become quite apparent/ pieces short like a ferret’s neck

Hot Seat Judges: We’re gonna be totally honest and say that anything that rhymed was going to get the point, but the subject was appropriate and entertaining as well. 2 out of 5

After Eric S raised the bar last week with a stunning 4 out of 5, the Hot Seat was back to its scorching ways, keeping Open Mike Eagle at bay with a decent 2. You can catch up with Mike in Machine Gun Funk.

Next week we have another music zone staffer – Broken Dial’s Greg Wind!

2007 Hot Seat Results
Friday May 25 – Mike Eagle – 2 out of 5
Friday May 18 – Eric S – 4 out of 5
Friday May 11 – Steve Murray – 2 out of 5
Friday May 4 – Danny Cox – 2 out of 5
Friday March 2 – Kevin Wong – 0 out of 5
Friday February 23 – Scott “Kubryk” Sawitz – 3 out of 5
Friday February 16 – Gordi Whitelaw – 3 out of 5
Friday February 2 – Shawn M Smith – 1 out of 5

Hello Inside Pulse readers!

Have you ever wanted to write for Inside Pulse? Well now is your chance! Join up with one of the largest independent pop culture sites on the web, for any of the 14 zones

Please specify which zone you’d like to write for, and what you could see yourself doing there. We need reviewers, news commentators, podcasters and short column writers everywhere. Contact us at pulsehiring@gmail.com if you have any specific questions.

To apply, send a sample of your writing, with the topic and style you’d use on the site (not something pre-existing unless it is typical of what you’d write here) to pulsehiring@gmail.com . We always get a lot of submissions, and will let you know either way, so don’t worry if we don’t get back to you immediately!

Note that writing for Inside Pulse is voluntary, but there are a number of perks, including interviews, freebies and getting your writing and name exposed to 10s of 1000s of readers each week.

A few don’ts:
DON’T include your resume, only a listing of other sites you might have written for
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A few do’s:
DO present something original and fresh
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Don’t hesitate, we’re only accepting applications between now and Friday January 26th so get your submission in now!

pulsehiring@gmail.com

Widro

Fascination Autumn

If you could somehow take Mozart and play him Led Zeppelin 1, then put him in a room with a pro-tools rig, what he’d come out with would sound like fascination autumn. Or at least if you get four high school seniors together and let them produce themselves and they happen to creating a brand of music that breaks genre barriers. From Sparta New Jersey Fascination Autumn, lead by Martin Bonventre a whiz on the Korg infused classical piano with progressive rock and an explosive live show. Heavy on the effects, guitarist Steve Marion brings out Floyd-like tones – they music makes you pinch yourself to make sure you know your not imaging this!

Download MP3:

A new Bon Jovi album due in the spring will be a “loud guitar, big rock record,” Jon Bon Jovi told Billboard in a recent interview. “We’re very excited about it, and I’m very confident it’s going to be a big record for us.”

Guitarist Richie Sambora added the band will launch a world tour in the late spring to support the album, dates for which have not yet been announced.

“I think we stumbled upon something again on this particular record, kind of like what happened with ‘It’s My Life,”‘ Sambora said. “When (that) came out, it seemed to give Bon Jovi a whole new audience. We’ve always had a vast audience base, but with this new record, what I’m feeling (is) it’s kind of a new direction. It sounds very fresh, yet it sounds like us.”

“It’s My Life” was the first single from Bon Jovi’s 2000 album “Crush,” which went double-platinum (shipments in excess of two million copies) in the United States.

The band worked with producer John Shanks (Michelle Branch, Melissa Etheridge), who also co-wrote tracks with Jon Bon Jovi and Sambora. The album was recorded late this summer.

Jon Bon Jovi noted changes in the climate of the country, and the state of the music business, influenced the songwriting on the new album.

The songs reflect “personal and introspective views on issues I may have had growing up that I certainly would have never discussed publicly before. I’ve always kept this ‘chin up, glass is half-full’ kind of optimism, and (now) I showed some chinks in the armor.”

The song “Last Man Standing” depicts the band leader’s unhappiness with the music industry. He said it reflects his “disgust of the music business in general, and its lack of true vision when it comes to supporting the artistry of developing a song, the songwriter and the bands on the road.”

“Instead of creating what Andy Warhol once called ‘15 minutes of fame,’ I think it’s down to just three minutes and 30 seconds,” he says. “I don’t know how this industry is ever going to have another Bob Dylan when it’s all about the single, (not) the album and the vision and that inspiration. (It’s) all for the sake of a 99-cent download so they can sell bulk and make their bonuses. It’s heartbreaking.”

A four-CD/one-DVD box set, “100,000,000 Bon Jovi Fans Can’t Be Wrong,” will be released Nov. 16 on Island Records.

In conjunction with its release, the band will stage a Nov. 21 concert at the Borgata in Atlantic City, N.J. The show will be the basis of the premiere episode of “INHD’s Center Stage,” which will be broadcast live on the high-definition cable network INHD and its spinoff INHD2. It will also be cybercast on Samsung Electronics America’s Web site.

Bon Jovi is also confirmed to make a Nov. 23 appearance on NBC’s “Today” morning show.

Source: Titus, Christa “New Bon Jovi Studio Album, Tour Due Next Spring” Reuters/Billbaord
26 October 2004

The long-awaited Nirvana box set ‘With The Lights Out’ will feature 68 previously unreleased recordings.

To be released on November 23, the four-disc set will feature 81 tracks including 68 previously unreleased recordings-rehearsals, outtakes, frontman Kurt Cobain’s home demos, as well as a DVD which is confirmed to have unreleased band home movies, live footage, rehearsal footage and 20 full-length video performances. A 60-page booklet will accompany the release.

The title is a reference to a lyric in ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’.

A source told NME.com: “I’ve seen some of the footage and it’s amazing stuff. There’s a video of them performing at a friend’s party with Kurt reading lyrics off a sheet of paper on the wall, footage of them covering ‘Seasons In The Sun’ in a studio with Kurt on drums and lots of other great stuff.”

The artwork for the set is currently being put together, with the likely choice being a ‘landscape’ box.

From NME.com 14 October 2004

If you\’re in the greater New York City area, Inside Pulse is happy to bring the first of what should be a continuing series of indie rock shows in Manhattan. Teaming up with Alecon Entertainment, the Pulse is co-promoting a night of rock at the Continental in NYC!

InsidePulse staff will be on hand including me and Matthew Michael among others TBA. Plus we have a whole night of bands! Here is who is scheduled to appear:

- Patrick Thomas
- Mutlu
- Filomath
- Alison Breitman
- Jeremiah Freed
- Full Out Freak
- Subcommittee
- Rehab

Check out Pulse Music for bios, MP3 downloads, CD reviews and much more on these bands!

Inside Pulse presents the first ever InsidePulse Concert Series Event on Tuesday October 12th. If you\’re in the greater New York City area, Inside Pulse is happy to bring the first of what should be a continuing series of indie rock shows in Manhattan. Teaming up with Alecon Entertainment, the pulse is co-promoting a night of rock at the Continental in NYC!

Alison Breitman

Bio

The buzz is only getting louder…

Following a successful CD release party at The Cutting Room, NYC, word is spreading – this is a whole different side of Alison.

\”I wanted to have fun this time around,\” she says of her genre-switching sophomore album, one that focuses more on the rock side of folk-rock. \”I wanted to make a record that was reflective of my life at that moment – the relationships I was in, the music I was listening to, and the games I was playing.\”

The album, aptly titled The Game, does just that. A witty collection of 11 songs, The Game describes relationships in all forms – playful, contentious, unrequited, sexual, loving, and newly born. Both tough and vulnerable, it is an edgy portrayal of a girl taking encounters into her own hands, turning the tables, and playing the games we all know so well.

Alison is no stranger to these experiences she describes in her lyrics. Born in the suburbs of Chicago and raised in Long Island, New York, Alison learned early on to combine the tough, free-speaking attitude of New York with a Midwestern sweetness. Not afraid to show her vulnerability, she expresses her emotions with abandon – in tune with listeners’ desires to connect and empathize with an artist and music. Her ever-evolving style has adopted the edge that wisdom has provided through the years, and it carries into the theme and feel of The Game, making it a compelling listen.

Expressing emotion through music comes easily to Alison, who has been singing since the age of four. Classically trained throughout her schooling, she tested her skills in various forms of performance: opera, musical theater, and contemporary folk. Bearing the cold and snow, Alison ventured to the University of Michigan where she studied music and psychology. It was there that she expanded her musical strengths, teaching herself to play the guitar. She soon discovered a penchant for songwriting. A poet at heart, Alison finally had a vocal outlet for her intense writings. The songs, a selection of ten written between 1996 and 1998, make up her debut album, The Good Person’s Angel (recorded and released in August 2001).

Alison returned home to New York in 2000, where she has been working steadily at her craft. She finds her inspiration in her everyday life and from the lively city around her, which goes directly to her songs and fuels her live performances. The embodiment of her passion for her art and the honesty of her experiences make her a powerful watch. Audiences are riveted, offering pin-drop silence during a song and rousing applause afterward. Never one to play the same show twice, Alison regularly keeps her fans surprised with new songs or revamped versions of older material. She is a presence on stage – a light many can relate to and admire with equal ease, who always keeps her listeners coming back for more.

With The Game tucked under her belt, Alison Breitman is poised for success as an artist with an incomparable voice and a whole lot to say. This is a different side of Alison, one that brings a new level of energy to an already impressive body of work.

And the future only promises to reveal even more facets of this intriguingly complex and admirably talented woman.

MP3 Downloads

Get in the Game
Unknowing
Running Unsteady

Inside Pulse presents the first ever InsidePulse Concert Series Event on Tuesday October 12th. If you’re in the greater New York City area, Inside Pulse is happy to bring the first of what should be a continuing series of indie rock shows in Manhattan. Teaming up with Alecon Entertainment, the pulse is co-promoting a night of rock at the Continental in NYC!

Jeremiah Freed

Bio

Jeremiah Freed blends classic 70s rock, with a bit of blues and a touch of modern influences to create American rock ‘n roll at it’s best. Although the York, Maine natives (Joe Smith – vocals, Kerry Ryan – drums, Matt Cosby – bass, Nick Goodale – guitar) are just in their early twenties, their musicianship is more mature than bands twice their age. Their latest release, Slowburn, captures listener’s attention with fiery guitar solos, soulful vocals, and emotionally intense lyrics.

MP3 Downloads

From Jeremiah Freed:
Again

From Slow Burn:
Reflect Your Light
Do My Best

Australian rocker Diana Anaid’s first US single, “Last Thing,” from her debut album Beautiful Obscene, has become iTunes’ biggest Single of the Week ever.

The album, recently released in the United States on independent label Five Crowns Music, is currently among the top 25 pop albums on iTunes.

“Knowing that more people than ever before downloaded Last Thing from the iTunes site in just one week is absolutely fabulous,” said Diana, on tour in Los Angeles.

Writing songs since age nine, Diana’s music became her emotional outlet when the death of her mother sent her into a life of foster parents, charity organizations, food vouchers and uncertainty. Her unique guitar style, emotional lyrics and powerful voice have garnered Diana multiple ARIA Award nominations (Australia’s Grammy) and three Top 40 singles in her native Australia. With the release of Beautiful Obscene in the States she is poised to become the first female rocker to join the U.S. Aussie invasion that includes the likes of Jet, The Vines, The Everyones & The Living End.

Diana’s American debut is being released by music industry veteran Paul Palmer through his Five Crowns Music. Former co-owner of Trauma Records, Palmer launched the careers of No Doubt as well as Bush, and now has his support behind the raw talent of Diana Anaid.

She is currently on a cross country trip visiting radio stations and television morning shows and performing at concerts from Orlando to San Francisco. Diana has shared the stage with artists including Five for Fighting, The Calling, Gavin Degraw and Sister Hazel.